Boo Bess is back as your host tonight, dressed in red as a pantsless executive, opening the proceedings sharply at 21.45.

I promise I’ll be gentle. I never keep my promises.

Matthew Holtzclaw is up first, giving us a choice between an old Broadway song or a magic trick. If I tell you it ended in fire you know what the crowd chose.

“Shall I bring out the next performer? Are you ready? No you’re not. But I’m going to do it anyway, cause it’s my only job.”

Medianoche comes out to a Count Basie song, perfectly timing her rear shakes to the keys of the piano break.

Hazel Honeysuckle is next, playfully scorned after being taken advantage of, feathers on her head, and dropping her cherry red balls to her mouth.

Sydni Deveraux comes out all dressed in yellow, showing off her nine feet of legs.

Nasty Canasta closes the set pinkhaired to an unspotifyable song by Royal Crown Revue called “Take a Long Drink for Me”, which she proceeds to do before getting in the tub, emptying her glass in it, and marking the splash zone with a few kicks and hair throws. She ends lodging her flute glass between her rear cheeks twice and filling it sight unseen, and then empties the whole bottle for the finish.

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