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Slippery Sundays

I had not ever made it to a Sunday evening at The Slipper Room before, so it was high time I put in some effort.

Set 1

Our hostess/femcee for the evening was Fancy Feast, dressed in red.

First up: Seedy Edie, all in red as well, with what she was dancing to on her head: Horns.

Qualms Galore brought us Soul Bossa Nova with a hairbow tie. This was my first time seeing her perform, and the first and most obvious thought that came to mind was, “I wonder who’s taller, her or Sydni Deveraux?”

Michael Karas came out to juggle, prompting someone in the audience to yell out “Look at those balls!”. Things took a turn for the weird when the curtain opened up and a puppet joined the act to the tune of the song from the Muppets, showing off Michael’s perfect timing to the music as the puppet took a bite out of a few of the balls.

When the raucous bachelorette party in the back made a lot of noise during the dance contest, Fancy went “Y’all are not the balcony but you’re drunk enough to think you are and I love that about you!”

And then Fancy introduced herself for an act, on the crossroads of NPR, Judaism and BDSM – “fifty shades of Oy Vey” as she called it. Interestingly enough, Christian Gray’s voice sounded a lot like Satan’s from last Friday. She got undressed, chained herself to the back curtain, then broke free and threw herself on hands and knees on the gogo box.

Next up, Emily Shephard channeled Lana Del Rey, ending up with a painter’s palette with four colors, all of them glitter, for cover.

Qualms Galore was on the gogo box during intermission as Emily shepherded the tip bucket around the room.

Set 2

Fancy came back with an umbrella, dove into the audience to Eva Cassidy’s “Stormy Monday”, and as she checked the room for bachelorettes, birthdays, and first dates, she commented to someone pointing out another couple: “You’re ratting out a first date that you’re not even on.”

Seedy Edie followed as a black Raven, blending a soothing Lullaby Of Birdland with a Karen O-squawked Immigrant Song.

As a sex educator, Fancy opened up the floor to sex questions. After giving some sage advice on how to get your husband to go along with pegging to the visiting Burlesque dancer from Montana, she also introduced us to the proper technique for a back door visit. She started by having us all roll up our hand so we could practice the technique with her. Halfway through, as the room was breaking up with laughter, she berated us: “You all are dying and we’re not even in the asshole yet.”

A tough act to follow, and Fancy apologized in advance to the next performer. Emily came back as a pussycat with the help of Deee-Lite. Qualms Galore asked all the men in the audience why they don’t do right.

Finishing the second set is a thankless job, and doubly so if you’re a man and not the dancing girl the audience was hoping for. But Kanye was on the phone to raise the stakes, and Michael did his incredible BeyoncĂ© number:

And with that, Fancy closed the night: “This is Slippery Sundays. That’s not a name, it’s a guarantee.” And as she said goodbye to the audience, a woman at a table threw a bouquet of flowers at her.

Emily Shephard came out for the second round of gogo dancing, which got a few women to come out and lie backwards on the gogo box with money on their face, ready for pickup. Not a bad way to finish a Sunday evening.